Imported Direct From Paris (and no, that's not Paris, Idaho, you idiot!), home town of the INFAMOUS Follies Bergiere, it's . . .
UNcut UNcensored UNauthorized UNexpurgated UNexonized UNadulterated UNruly
and most of all UNremittingly UNrivaled
Resist much. Obey little.
This page has been accessed
times since it was established in 22 February 1996; it was last updated 23 February 1996.
True to our motto, "Indecency Never Sleepeth", we are continually
adding and updating our inventory of indecency for your prurient enjoyment. Search for "[NEW]"
to find new or updated items.
About a month ago, learning by chance from one of our casual acquaintances down at
Capitol Hill that indecency was
soon to be tightly regulated and restricted, the highly trained and experienced
staff here at The Indecency Page suddenly started thinking back to our freshman economics class. Let's see . . .
supply reducing . . . demand increasing . . . price . . . now how did that work again? . . . price down? . . . price
same? . . . no, no, no: PRICE SKYROCKETS! That's it! Jackpot!!!!
With little dollars signs floating continuously around in ours eyes, our crack staff here at the Indecency Division
began a frantic worldwide
search for cybersmut--you know, that stuff that everybody
just knows is lurking around every corner of cyberspace--and
other such nasties and naughties as infallibly would bring the public streaming into our corporate headquarters, and keep the cash streaming at high speed into our corporate coffers.
It didn't take long--we soon found a whole collection of titillating cyber-indecency,
and thus we have . . .
1. Local indecencies. This is our own personal stash of indecency that we maintain here at Indecency World-Wide
This first indecency is one I really like, for many reasons. It is an excerpt from The Monkey Wrench
Gang by Edward Abbey (New York: Avon Books, 1976). The book is a wild romp through the back roads of
Southern Utah, as our heroes throw a monkey wrench into the path of advancing civilization. Worst of
all, it is recommended by Playboy ("Excellent high adventure!"). I found portions of
Chapter 21 to be deliciously indecent.
Indecency is everywhere! There's indecency in my mail box, in my library, in my basement,
in my coat closet, in my ice chest, in my mother's jam, in . . . in . . . in . . . EEEEeeeeek!!!!!!! Even in my . . . . . .
That 16th Century pornographer Botticelli contributes his share to our indecencies
with a disgusting depiction of The Birth of Venus. . .
That dreaded 18th Century purveyor of lewdness and indecency
Jacques Louis David
adds a filthy rendition of The Rape of the Sabine Women
to our already revolting collection . . .
Not wanting to be left out, the Pro-Lifers have contributed their share to our indecency--and yup,
I do mean the upright, hyper-Christian PRO-Lifers, NOT those nefarious old immoral liberal and
all-around-good-fer-nothin' Pro-Choicers. Connoisseurs of indecency won't want to miss
this juicy Pro-Life morsel.
2. Worldwide Indecency. These are particularly juicy items that our dedicated and hard-working staff
have found in our worldwide
computer search for cyber-smut. Although we do not maintain these items, we offer this list
of links for your prurient enjoyment:
One of the biggest purveyors of cyber-smut is--you guessed it: The Vatican.
The Martyrdom of Saint Erasmus by Nicolas Poussin
(a 73K jpeg) has it all--it depicts abuse, lewdly exhibits the genitals,
pubic area, and buttocks, and--hey! are those naked
kids I see hanging around the top of this so-called 'art'work? Well, I won't even get into that . . .
The lyrics to Carl Orff's Carmina Burana. If
anything is indecent, these lyrics are . . .
The U.S. Supreme Court publishes a lot of smut and seems to spend
a lot of its collective time thinking and writing about indecency and obscenity.
All recent Supreme
Court decisions are online.
From this motherlode of monstrosities I have chosen
one small example.
The whole government is, in fact, nothing but a gigantic treasure-trove of indecency. Check out:
The story of the rescue of Captain O'Grady from
Bosnia. I understand that this post created a furor when it was released on the internet even before the government's
official version was released. But that furor will be nothing compared to the one our beloved Senator Exon will
raise when he finds out that Navy fliers have been posting NAUGHTY WORDS on the net. Tut-tut. They'll probably take
their medals away. [NEW]
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