Chill Factor (4 Feb 1996): 0%
According to a New York Times column by Charles Levendosky:
The telecom bill refers to a curious section of Title 18 of the U.S. Code and alters it to include interactive computer
services (meaning Internet and E-mail).
That section (1462) of the U.S. Code makes it illegal to transport materials, drugs, and medicines used for abortion and
includes a prohibition against books or pamphlets about abortion. It also makes it illegal to give information about where
abortions are performed.
So the telecom bill, as passed, forbids the communication of all such information over Internet or by E-mail.
Attention fellow Pro-Lifers! S. Elf Righteous here with an Important Announcement
relevant to your eternal salvation.
My top-flight investigative staff here at The Indecency Page recently uncovered a
nefarious and heretofore unknown fact: the Planned Parenthood clinic right here in Kansas City
are a bunch of baby killers! The gall of them, right here under my very righteous nose!!!
It's horrendous! It's revolting!!! It's disgusting!!!!! It MUST be
STOPPED!!!!!! According to their very own literature, "Planned Parenthood of Greater Kansas City provides
pregnancy testing, birth control, and caring,
confidential abortion services." ("Caring" abortion--hrrruMMmph!)
This is unbelievable!!! This disgrace must END!!!!! This horrifying
BLIGHT on our fair city MUST BE WIPED OUT, CLEANED OFF, and FLUSHED down to the
NETHERMOST REGIONS OF HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!
I invite all my fellow pro-lifers to picket the Planned Parenthood clinic at
1001 East 47th Street, Kansas City, Missouri. Also call the clinic at (816) 756-2277 and express
your disapproval of their nefarious actions. --Elf
Well, hrrrmph, ahem, cough-cough, aaaahhhhh, hrrrrrrRRRRrrrrrrmmMMMmmmmppPPPpph. Aaahh, well, I just KNOW that the Indecency Bill here was a really great and inspired idea NECESSARY to protect our GREAT AND GLORIOUS CHRISTIAN NATION from the influence of godless infidels and WORST of ALL secular HUMANISTS!!!!!!!!!!!! But it seems that something has gone awry here. How can my own infallibly spiritual and inspired writing be . . . er, uuuhhh, oh, uummmm, oh, yes! I see now!!! It's the commies, yeah, that's it, the commies, and the Trilateral Commission, yes, they've . . . and the ATF--they're in on this, and . . . and don't forget the REAL ENEMY the libral EASTERN PRESS!!!!! Yeah, that's it . . . I smell cover-up here! And conspiracy!! And . . . HEY NOREEN! LOAD ME UP THAT AK-47 AND BRING IT OVER HERE AND I MEAN GIT YER BUTT MOVING ON IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! I'm going to take that sucker and go out and fix this here problem PERSONALLY and I mean FIX IT UP GOOD . . . them Goddamn commies and libral hippy freeloaders are going to have a REAL CHRISTIAN to deal with, and I don't mean one of them fake-o weak-kneed, lilly-livered lay down and take it on the other cheek types, EITHER . . . --Elf